I was accused of rape.
I am a gay man of 60.
I am also wealthy.
I have lived alone for decades but do have a fun ton of friends.
In 2017 at a friends party with around 50 people there, I was accused of raping a guy at the party - and it ws only when the police came round to my house 2 days later that I knew anything about it.
Someone at the party I had been chatting with for a long time and having a great laugh with, and I admit we did go into a bedroom at the party to talk in depth about this young guys career fuck up and where I was offering advise - and that was it... there was no sexual contact at all, not a cuddle, not a kiss - and I cannot even remember touching him in any manner.
Anyway, I was arrested and finger printed and the usual stuff and my solicitor came and it was a long winded and painful 9 months until, in court, my doctor gave evidence to show that as I had prostate problems and had had for over 20 years - and was on two different medications, getting an erection was impossible for me and that sexually, I had not had anything intimate in over 2 decade - and where I cannot even wank. Well, as you can imagine, it saved the day and the guy was arrested and busted for wasting police time and served 14 weeks in jail. I also took him to court and got a judgement against him for damages but as he had nothing, I expected nothing, but after going through absolute hell, he needed to suffer as much as myself and he deserved everything he got.
I never understood why he did such a thing as he never asked me for money, he never blackmailed or twisted my arm or anything. We just shared a pleasant conversation where I was trying to help and guide him forward.
It seems that it is NOT worth doing a nice thing for others as they return and bite you in the arse and instead of a simple thank you, you get abuse.
My friends stood by me and this saved me from a lot, and even while the local paper made a field day out of it, I was completely exonerated - but it does leave its mark, its emotional scars, and it stops me wanting to help anyone in future as it seems there are ulterior motives in many peoples minds and I don't want anything to do with it any more.
John Bellamy Comments:
Thank you for your story about what must have been a difficult and traumatic time for you Roger.
Many do not think about men raping other men but it does happen and it happens far more than is reported and sexual assault against men is not always done by other men.
Women rape as well.
Women are sexual predators as well.
Blaming men for everything is irresponsible reporting and seeing the reality - the truth - is the only way forward.
Sexuality is a prime driving force for many but not for others. Men do seem to be a lot more sexual than women and this is where the problem starts. Too mush sexual manipulation by women towards men and I saw it with my own Mother - the way she metered out sex to my Father if and when he did the right thing, bought the right dress for her, did something nice for the family, etc. and it was a problem for him right through my childhood and all us children were aware of ' troubles in the camp' and all because my Father complained of too little sex at home, and that as my Mother had no income and lived off the House Keeping Money, as was common at the time, she had no power, no voice and was even known as MRS. BRIAN BELLAMY and had lost her own identity and the only thing she had, the only power she had, the only controlling mechanism she had that she knew worked and kept hubby under her control ( ? ) was the sex she metered out in dribs and drabs if and when the man of the house permormed as a husband and father in accordance to how she viewed things, and his input was not really required as far as she was concerned.
When you castrate anyone in this manner - when you take the wings of the fly or the legs off the spider, what do you expect to happen.
Women still manipulate men sexually and denying this is redundant but that is NOT to say that rape is - as no form of violence, be it sexual or otherwise, is acceptable and where NO MEANS NO.