Naughty School Boy Weekend Cancelled.
This article will be a bit harsh. I am going to say it as it is - No holes barred ;- Nothing held back. ( well - slightly at least as my full vent would be XRATED... ) I am irritated and pissed off. It saddens me as this should not be the case. It saddens me that the gay community really is an appalling place and so unsupportive of itself - and where people ask for things and then make excuses why they cannot, and then they wonder why there is nothing available.
Many years ago a man rented the downstairs rooms to put on 'THE DORSET CANING CLUB ' one day a month and it garnered around a dozen people each time.
Then the host became too ill to continue so I took it over and Big Stewart ran it then for me for the next couple of years until his health became to bad as well.
So as it was getting quieter and quieter I changed it from monthly, to quarterly - thinking it might pick up if we limited how many times per year it was available, and this did not help numbers either.
We shared some great afternoons but just not enough people.
It was £10 entrance with all the soft drinks and even red and white wines freely available with snacks etc. and people actually moaned about the cost and expected it for free, which made me want to hit them, except that's what they wanted. Hundreds of £ worth of equipment - staff to pay, a hotel to arrange around this event and they wanted it all for free - or at least moaned all the time about paying £10, and I ask you, WTF can you get for a tenner these days.
The same service with a paid sex worker would be over £150 FOR AN HOUR with barely anything to drink, if you are lucky.
So I eventually closed it down as uneconomic - a waste of my time and a waste of my money in staffing and preparations for - well - bugger all.
This is a business.
Not some part time thing I play at.
I could make a great deal more money by turning the venue straight but I see hope for the LGBT community and it seems many on the LGBT community only see anything for themselves and not the community at all.
I try and see the best in people but sadly all they offer, too often , is far less than their best.
It's not in my front lounge in some flat or house some place;- Hamilton Hall is a hotel, a business, with HUGE OVERHEADS - and we have all the correct licenses, insurances and Health & Safety etc. sorted and paid and STILL people expect it for free.
People even now keep asking for The Dorset Caning Club and considering we closed it down some 4 years ago, is somewhat annoying as - where were these people when we needed the group to survive ? No use now - where were you then ?
I run the venue as a NOT FOR PROFIT VENUE;- but it has to pay for itself and all profits made and applied in giving FREE HOLIDAYS TO THE NEEDY - and NO OTHER GAY MENS VENUE IN THE COUNTRY GIVES AWAY AS MUCH AND AS OFTEN AS WE DO and every penny that covers the cost of these freebies, comes from MY POCKET, and not some charity, council office, corporate body or a religious organisation, but from me working 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year, and anywhere between 10 - 18 hours a day.
EVERY SINGLE DAY OF THE YEAR - and where I do not get paid a wage - all I get is my home and board.
I am not some part time host like those who volunteer for other groups A COUPLE OF TIMES A YEAR and ride the wave of 'How fabulous I am ' - when it really is all about me me me ' - like so many who supposedly help out on various committees etc.
Too much ego, too much attitude, too much me me me .
This is 365 days a year for the last 23 years and dare I ask;- Where are those other hosts these days - with so many vanishing after Covid never to be seen again ? Hamilton Hall was here with its multi million read weekly Blog all through the pandemic and lockdown while, where was anyone else ?
It does NOT just happen, it happens because people work HARD and in this case, the appreciation of what we were offering was so bad, so thoughtless and so inconsiderate – I decided to close it down. I am not a fool and when taken for one, and when taken for granted and when not appreciated for what we offer while people moan there is nothing to do and how no one is offering anything alternative, it really pisses people and organisations off – and when they then close through lack of support - you then go without.
For me, while it greatly disappoints that so many people really are so lacking, it shows me once again how so many want things but are not prepared to actually do something about it.
Sadly the attitude of ' expecting everything for free' shone through LOUD AND CLEAR from some who attended and it was quite insulting how some treated us here, and as you can imagine, they got put right in their place as I am The Boss, The Master, and I REFUSE to be patronised.
Who DO these people think they are ?
A while ago I had so many requests for more - for a whole weekend for Naughty School Boys and after great consideration and a lot of money spent in adverts, and after a lot of interest is shown, all I get is 2 bookings.
Not enough guys - and I have had at least 15 e mails from guys saying they are washing their hair that weekend - they have a prior engagement - ANYTHING NOT TO ATTEND and considering they were given 6 months notice for the event date, and considering THEY ASKED FOR THIS - and especially considering THERE IS NOTHING ELSE LIKE IT - these excuses are precisely that - excuses and it really irritates.
So I am cancelling the event. It's annoying guys but has been a regular occurrence since opening, people ask for midweek events and then do not book - they ask for specific things and then expect it for free - and then complain loud and clear about Hamilton Hall when we pull out - as in this case.
You asked for this event – we offered – you messed us about - and now you go without.
No use complaining everything is in America and nothing ever in the UK, for when we do offer, you do not support, so once again, you go without.
I shall spend the weekend catering to my every day guests who will fill the venue for the dates cancelled and we will have a lot more time to ourselves to relax in the garden with a cocktail and some good company and all those naughty schoolboys can go without the fantasy and the dreams that could have become a reality but they chose otherwise.
Here I am, in the garden, relaxing and enjoying some ME TIME instead of always being there for others who - it seems - don't give a fuck.
If they do, they sure need lessons in showing it. So - no stress, no worries, nothing annoying - just a wonderful afternoon in the garden with friends, chilling.
So if you want something special, ask, and we can see what we can do to assist, but if you are not even willing or able to even attend your own event, then don't expect me to show any interest either.
If you are irritated by this piece, I DON'T GIVE A FUCK. It's YOUR lack of interest - YOUR lack of being able and willing to pay and YOUR inability to appreciate what you have on offer - and use it - rather than loosing it
It saddens me as - as we work hard at bringing you want you ask - and then to be so badly let down, by a community so fragmented there really IS NO LGBT COMMUNITY - AT ALL - and no support between gay men unless you are rich, handsome, hung like a horse or famous ( enough talking about me ... ha ha ) and then all you get surrounded with is sycophant's.
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Dear John,
Yes, it must be very frustrating and disheartening for you. I think some of it is down to post-pandemic apathy. Many people have just got out of the habit of socialising, going out and committing – I see this in both gay and straight organisations to which I belong.
Sadly, I probably won’t book for another event as I am 71 in a couple of weeks and long drives are getting tougher for me. So could you put a £400 refund back on my card ending 1301 and keep a donation of £100 in part recompense for all the hard work which you have put in.
Best, Charles
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