Offer something kind and thoughtful and have it smacked back in your face.

Below is a Trip Advisor review recently placed by someone who accepted some free days here AS MY GUEST - BECAUSE HIS LOVER HAD JUST DIED and my heart went out to him and I offered a few days away for free and as a Bereavement Therapist, I thought he would benefit from a few days away from all of it - although wasn't aware he was going to fuck everything in the hotel - so much for grief - and he stayed an extra few days and paid for the extra days and absolutely delighted in the venue and our kindness. Then some time later he turns into a cunt.

Read below.

Wanted to book a visit but.......

I didn't stay, wanted too, but thank god for that! If there was a zero star he would get that for cert. What a very bizarre owner JB is. If you give him less than 5 stars he calls you Homophoic. Is this the right attitude from someone who is gay to call another LGBT person, "Homophobic"? I made a genuine enquiry by email about an up coming event, if was sent 3 times by mistake, but the only thing he really touched on was that fact, "you sent it 3 times"!

Then he chose to bomblast me by multiple emails (9 emails) about you "Are you in need of your medication dear." telling me to "f**k off" “Take your meds dear“ "You do not deserve respect - dear," "I have enough coping with bitchy attitude faggots" "Ha ha … so I get the last laugh" "your carer needs to increase your medication somehow" "Why – my dear – have you so over reacted to a simple comment." its called sarcastic and didn't need to be mentioned did it Mr J B. In my conclusion from the order and responses Mr JB is a bully, no feelings, crawl and nasty. He thinks by blocking me is going to hurt, it won't, I would never dream of going to that place now and glad he didn't win 4 in a bed years ago. He comes across as a controlling freak, a clear bully and if you run him up the wrong way bombard you with profanity and insults, he is a disgrace to the LGBT community. I am happy for him! As threatened! To publish my emails but as long as he publishes his responses in full, unedited, as I have retained all. If he publishes my name or my contact details or emails he will be sued. I have asked Mr J B to remove my personal data and email addresses under the GDPR data protection. Conclusion, a very rude man with serious, personal, mental health issues. Calls everyone who challenges him as "homophobic"

Date of stay: November 2021

Response from , Owner at Hamilton Hall Men Only Hotel

This is the response I put on Trip Advisor

This is the man who after his partner died I offered him a few days as my guest - for free - and I will point out - A COMPLETE STRANGER TO HAMILTON HALL - with dinner and everything and after the few days free - he loved it here so much he paid to stay a few days longer and was completely blown away by the kindness and consideration from a complete stranger to his loss and how we were here for him at a time when he needed a break - and all for free and all from a complete stranger - me.

This is during Covid where people are all a little ginger and 'on edge' as we are all suffering one way or the other. Somehow he forgets to tell you this and never leave a THANK YOU JOHN report on Trip Advisor after that free break but is oh so fast to find fault when it suits him and scramble to Trip Advisor to vent his bile which tells me he is a very unhappy man and still suffering from his loss and is in the grief stage of anger - and has decided to aim his anger at me ( many aim it at the doctors and those who helped ) when I am not the cause of his loss or his grief or the real reason he is venting here, this is just an excuse to throw his anger and sorrow at someone else and he thinks - thinks - it will make him feel better when all he has done is be a homophobe ( gay men are homophobes dear - not straight men and you REALLY should know that ) and I feel desperately sorry for him that he is still stuck in anger and has not moved on in his healing process.

He e mailed 3 times asking the same thing within an hour of each other and expected and then complained I had not taken his booking at 10pm at night, disrespecting I want some time to myself and not working 24 hours a day. I already work 7 days a week FOR NO WAGE AT ALL and he actually had the nerve, the temerity, to complain I did not take his booking at 10pm and would process it in the morning. He then went off on one, e mail galore., and I am left scratching my head and I will tell someone to FUCK OFF and I will not take abuse especially from someone who had enjoyed a free holiday here as my guest - and THAT my dear reader - absolutely disgusts me. This is the kind of gay men who gets the gay scene a very bad name and who is disliked within the gay world because they do not support, they just take take take and then complain when they do not get the answer they want. I suggest you get some Bereavement Therapy as you are clearly stuck in anger and you will find friends and family not wanting to be near you and as you rant with me, you will with others, and you may need to get some counselling. I am sorry for what transpired and this man really offended after we gave so much of ourselves and our venue to help and support a man at a time when he was unwell and in grief, to then weeks later turn that on us in such a vile manner absolutely disgusts me. Total disgust that someone could so turn from a really nice man the first visit, then to turn into such a vile bitter angry man and all over me mentioning he needs only send an e mail once. Everyone is worthy but when they act like this and completely turn it against the person who was here to support and offer kindness, then you have shown yourself to be a nasty piece of work. I absolutely thought you were better than this and sadly, through your grief, you have shown you are not.

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Do you know how annoying it is when after all we have been through this last - almost - 2 years - ALL OF US - and when someone puts himself out to be kind and considerate towards others - and usually complete strangers as in this above, to then have that person turn on them in this manner absolutely disgusts me. It appalls me. It makes me sick of the whole scene and sick of those who constantly find fault and throw abuse and make demands that are all about them getting attention while those who offer are abused and left reeling from the shock that someone could be such a cunt to the very person who was being kind and thoughtful.

I am THOROUGHLY DISGUSTED - ABSOLUTELY APPALLED - SICKENED BY THIS ASSHOLE WHO FOUND IT IN HIS HEART TO TAKE HIS GRIEF, HIS OWN SORROW AND THROW IT AT ME AFTER ALL I DID FOR A COMPLETE STRANGER.

WHAT A HORRIBLE MAN HE TURNED OUT TO BE. Appreciating his grief does not excuse his actions at all and his dead partner would be appalled as much as I am at the manner in which he attacks others who have been nothing but kind and thoughtful towards him.

I AM SHOCKED AND I AM DISGUSTED.

John Bellamy

--------------------------------------- Dear John:

In response to your article "Trip Advisor" in your recent post, in all humility, I offer this:

After being in business for more than 30 years, and at times having up to 1,200 employees working for me I have discovered some truths that astound me.

1) No good deed goes unpunished.

2) The more you give the more they expect.

3) Most employees have no idea what being responsible for the business 24/7 means.

4) There isn't enough integrity to fill a thimble these days.

5) Karen's come in all kinds of shapes, sizes, and colors.

6) In the end the tax man wants the most for having done the least.

But we march on providing our product or service that everyone enjoys much to our amusement and little profit. Regards Chuck. ---------------------------------

Read your piece about Trip Advisor and the ungrateful customer. I learned decades ago that the public want more and more while wanting to pay less and less and in the gay world if you do not give these people every little thing they expect, they complain but would never think of complaining if it was a straight venue. They just love to bitch their own and so many gay men are abusive towards those within their own community. I feel for you John, Absolutely.

Richard. --------------------------------

Got your Newsletter Blog and for the first time had to write. Concerning the abusive customer you allowed to stay for free who then turned sour. This is so common John. So common. When I had a gay B&B some decades ago the guys were wonderful and horrible at the same time. Give with one hand and take with the other. Tell you to your face how wonderful it all was and then bitch everything behind your back. The only reason I can think of is they are either mentally unstable or they are green with envy. We only managed 11 years before it drove us nuts and we sold up and got as far away from the gay community as we could as it was driving us to despair, the horrendous attitude of a few ruined it for the rest. How you have lasted 21 years John is amazing. Happy Christmas ahead. Gerald.

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John: Just read your Blog. Thanks for yet another wonderful weekly read. Concerning the Trip Advisor guy:- Why put yourself out there to be abused when you know it will always end badly, however much you help those in need, they will always turn on you John and always turn into - as you call them - cunts. They take all you have to give and then complain when you stop. Thy make demands and then complain it wasn't big enough, hard enough, - and they never are happy with what you give. So stop giving John, although I know that is against your nature. If someone's life is in a mess, then leave them to sort it out themselves. Fuck 'em John. Worry about Number One. Peter C.

---------------------------- John: I ran a gay mens naturist group here in California some years ago and got so much hassle and abuse from members I quit and closed it. No one was willing to take it over from me when I quit and I gave 6 months notice - NOT A SINGLE PERSON OFFERED - and as soon as it closed all the complaining started as to why the group had closed, even though they had plenty of warnings and reasons given. It seems many do not pay attention and just want it if and when it suits them and to hell with how any group lasts in such a manner. Nothing was good enough. Complaints the members were all too old - too young - music was too loud - music was too soft - no one volunteered to help while members complained but did nothing to assist - and it just got too much. With 150 members and many who didn't want to pay our subscription and wanted it for free, after I closed the group many were like chickens running around with their heads cut off without a clue what to do, but disrespected and took advantage when I was open - and when we closed, then they paid attention and valued what was now lost - but too late. By then I was sick of the whole thing and sick of these dreadful faggots constantly demanding more while offering nothing at all. It ended and I am happier living life just for me - and my boyfriend - selfish like everyone else and not giving at all, as I was use to. I wish you well John and know you have my complete understanding of how you feel.

Stephen.

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