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Sad Days

It s with another sadness that I start this day.

I received an e mail this morning stating how another of our regular guests had died and it - kinda - stopped me in my tracks. Having spent several Christmas's with us and having stayed here many times - it was a bit of a shock. Along side this, a friend also doed unexpectantly and it does seem tragic.

I have been here for over 21 years. I am also no spring chicken at 66.

The older you get - and the longer you are in business - especially as we have always attracted the older clintelle, there are bound to be those who die and we will miss them and - sadly - or gladly - get on with our lives and loves and coping with what we have to do. We grieve and we give thanks.

When a lot of older people get together there is bound to be those who die younger than others and those who will out live and miss accordingly. It is human nature and while this happens at all ages, the older you get the more you feel it as friends and family are lost to us and we are faced with making new friends, and sometimes this can be hard.

We miss the family Thanks for their company.

Thanks for their business.

Thanks for their fiendship.

Thanks for being there for us - as we were for them - and for being part of my world as I was a part of theirs.

Life it too short but seems so long winded at the time.

Then suddenly some one is gone and we wish we'd done more.

Said more, been more, visited more,

Just - --- more --- maybe more time --- yes definately more time.

For as we busily get on with our lives we sometimes forget about how finite life is and how quickly it can be taken away whether with Covid or a heart attack, cancer or tragically a car crash, life - hangs on by a thread and once cut - is a memory - is history - is soon put to rest and within a short time as we join them, memories fade and lives are lost to the ether of time and no one eventually will ever know, ever understand, ever feel part of that life, those experiences now lost to makind but part of the Great Collective Unconscious - and that said - we still miss the person.

Another old friend of mine died recently as well and it has been hard finding any information as he had moved and his family have not responded so I am left not knowing and sometimes this is harder than knowing exactly what and where and how.

I shall always remember.

I shall always hold dear.

I shall always miss those days when …

And I shall hold the love dear to my heart and remember – in the years to come – yet more souls who have passed my way on this journey that left its marks on my heart and soul, a mark of love and respect and of a tender sharing on this yellow brick road of life. Some are remembered with anger and regret, some with affection and some with out, but however we remember them, WE DO REMEMBER THEM and their memory will live on within us.

So stop moaning.

Stop throwing tantrums

Stop being the bully

Stop being the baby

Stop thinking it will never end

Stop assuming anything as assumption will be proven wrong sometimes

And live your life to the full, talk, share, laugh, behave, misbehave, shout, be quiet, eat too much and fart the night away, get pissed occasionally or even stoned. Try Marmite some time and even anchovies just to see how mush to dislike – or surprise yourself with liking. Diet so you feel good and exercise if you want or even be a couch potato and adore your Corrie, EastEnders and Netflix with your bag of popcorn and chocolate.

Be gay – Be straight Be women – Be man Be old – Be young Be black – Be white Be whatever makes your heart sing and respect the songs of others. For life is short and the songs will fade and memories make our history as we see it Till the end.

BUT: Life is for the living.

Remembering and feeling sad and crying is natural.

Shed your tears.

Feel down in the dumps with loss.

So what if you cannot see the reason or the sense

There doesn’t have to be one.

Time’s up – and sometimes – it’s up for someone close.

As who are we to know the bigger plan

It’s a glorious autumnal day

The sun is shining

There is a lot to be thankful for and a lot to celebrate

Smell the fresh sea air – hear the seagulls –

So think I shall take the dog to the seaside for a walk and watch the waves on the shore – the clouds in the sky and the beauty that is all around me and as I see it is half full, things are ready to improve and – depending on how you choose to see improvement, it will be forthcoming if you jut show some patience, stay put, and hope.

Never give up hope.

Life is too short. Enjoy it moment to moment regardless of where you find yourself at. It’s all in the present moment – of NOW.

There will be days when I am sad – and days when I am happy. Days when I remember in great detail things that happened decades ago and yet, seem like yesterday and I do wonder where it all went. Then there will be people who will remind me of something long forgotten and I am in awe – to think I did all that.

So don’t be sad. Celebrate the life. The time spent together. The sharing and the love.

It’s just – at this moment – on this day, I am sad – and remembering.

If anyone has lost a partner or family member, friend or someone close during these recent troubled times, get in touch and we can see what we can offer – a couple of days with BB&EM as a way of giving something to look forward to and help cheer the spirit. John Bellamy



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