size doesn't matter...
Dear John Bellamy:- I read your piece about the guy with the huge dick. How envious I am., I have the tiniest dick you have ever seen. It doesn't stop there John.
I am 6'5". Weigh 19stone - and muscular - and I mean, I am a big strong muscular man with a huge solid frame. I look like a doorman , if that makes sense , with a very threatening look and the build to match. People are often trying to ' take me on;' in a fight just because of my size and because this has been a constant since childhood, I am quite capable of looking after myself and have even served time in prison because of this.
I get picked on because of my size.
I hear people in bars talking about me, as I do part the waters when I enter and people do notice me - and while this sounds wonderful and I have made a habit out of flirting with guys and pretending all sorts of things but I know deep down that I am never going to have sex with most the people I flirt and joke around with as they assume I am built all over and that my dick matches my build, when sadly, I have the dick and balls of a 5 year old and where my balls have not even totally come down and are still tight against my groin, no hanging at all.
My dick when hard, it barely 3 inches.
Now you can see my predicament.
No one wants a giant of a man with a teeny peeny for a dick. It's not the fantasy.
Naturally, I am passive.
It caused me great emotional pain until I got myself together and considered my options in life and how things would progress for me in life with this tiny weapon - and after quite a few vile comments from people I met for sex who were just obnoxious to me about it and where, I was so angry with one it ended up with me serving 30 days for a fight ( I thumped the ignorant little turd and broke his jaw ) I sat myself down and actually had a chat with my dick. Can you imagine that, sitting talking to my dick... ???
We discussed the fact that while I am a very attractive and desirable man - when naked - everyone acts so surprised and shocked, some laughed and some took pity and THANKYOU I do not need your fucking pity or laughter THANKYOU VERY MUCH - and I came to the realization that my sex life was to be passive and where I was very choosy who I actually had sex with and that if ANYONE gave me grief about my dick I would grab them by their balls - hard - and say ' You got a fucking problem mate '- and it kinda works.
I don't need people talking about my dick behind my back.
I don't need people feeling sorry for me.
Luckily I have really highly paid job and have an amazing lifestyle many envy so tend to use rent boys for sex and it works and it works very well. BUT: I do know others with dicks like mine who have turned angry and bitter at anyone who is hung, and their anger has clouded their whole world view and anyone and everyone - according to them - is against them in all ways when the truth is they have turned so inward resenting, that they hate the world and all because of their small dick. Many ruin good relationships that really could work, but for their own attitude towards their own dick is so negative, no one else is allowed not to care - because THEY worry and care enough for the whole world and NOTHING can get them out of their anger.
Big dicks are my fantasy just like most gay men and let's be honest, despite what some claim, we are all size queens and like a decent dick to play with and in my case, I have everything else but the dick and have made peace with that and it works just fine with me, so if you have a problem about small dicks, it really is your problem.
I was so pleased to receive Jacob's response to last weeks e mail from the super hung guy and to hear another side of what it must be like. We all know how vile many on the gay scene can be and how cruel. Good to see someone who has risen above these assholes and found peace within.
John: I have a small dick. My tummy hangs over and I have not actually seen my dick in some decades. Was always aware it was small and got married and managed to have some children but as soon as that was done my wife divorced me stating sexuality with me was a problem for her and this left me devastated. It crushed me. I cannot help having a small dick - or as she called it - Pencil Dick. I went to therapy. I went to self help groups, I went to all sorts of people and even talked to prostitutes and it was the sex workers were the most helpful and wise. These street walkers and agency Madams were so thoughtful and caring - and it seems the sex workers were the only ones not laughing or poking fun and it was through them that I managed to get over it all and see my way clear as a human being first and a dick second. Sex workers really do have the ability to help cure many of societies problems.
I think I was probably always interested in men and only started playing in my 50's and have enjoyed a good sex life since discovering my arse likes dick up it ( I never thought I would write that to anyone ) and am quite happy with my small dick as no one expects anything from me ... and that is a big problem in sex -= expectations.
John: Read your article about monster cocks. Not a comment on that but - women complain men cannot find their G Spot and complain men never manage to get them to cum - and I would say exactly the same thing about women, who have absolutely no idea how to work a mans cock. Cut or uncut, they haven't a clue and even when you show them, they go right back to what they were doing before and learn nothing and it's boring. It's the same thing John but to hear women complain about men, they don't realise they are just as bad.
It is very easy for someone like me with a big dick to say it really does not matter the size of your dick as long as it works, and to make friends with your own dick and enjoy it for what it can do for you , - and many with small dicks say I am patronising when I am not, that's just how they CHOOSE to accept someone's honest point of view - and it also shows their resentment held because of their small dick. We are all size queens and we all like something decent to play with, and many resent and envy, many allow this to fuck up their whole lives and relationships and all because of a small dick. I had a small dicked lover who was a VERY wealthy man who was SO FUCKED UP because he had a tiny dick that EVERY relationship he had, even with his Mother, was based in resentment, envy and anger and all - ALL - because of his dick.
It destroyed our relationship as he was always ragging me about my dick while enjoying it inside him.. stupid prick - and it eventually drove us apart and all - because he could not get over what he saw as his massive lacking and being a powerful wealthy man, his dick did not come up to expectations and he was so bitter.
In Vale, Colorado one day, my Mother said how she had heard us arguing and that all she heard was him shout at me -
' All you have going for you is a big dick.' -
and she said with a smile ' You take after your Father for that dear.' - and we both laughed.
As for only having a big dick and nothing else, how wrong was he.
His resentment pushed people away and some only stayed around because of his wealth. We split eventually and I went on to run a highly successful gay escort agency and was to earn a fortune as a sex worker ( with a background in psychology, bereavement counselling, interior design, hospitality * trained chef - and I can turn my hand to anything and fully succeed ) while he did nothing with his life as he could afford not to work, until he died a few years ago - largely I believe because of Crystal Meths - and only in his 60's - and BROKE, NO MONEY AT ALL, as he had spent the fucking lot, millions, gone, and while I may only have a big dick ( according to him ) it turned out that without his money, HE HAD FUCK ALL - and could not even get a job as he was unemployable.
His opinion being that all I had going for me was a big dick, was just ONE of the things I had going for me and yet because of his resentment and bitterness, he couldn't see past my dick and appreciate the true value in who and what he had as a lover and clearly, my dick played a large part in his attraction to me while everything else, it would seem, he overlooked.
And BOY did he overlook a lot.
Enjoy whatever you have and stop resenting as the only one who suffers, or cares - is you.
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