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'trans guys are hotter' - oh really ???

Content warning: This article contains descriptions of transphobia and anti-Trans sentiments.

To the man on my flight, going to his bachelor party wearing the “trans guys are hotter” t-shirt.

I know your friends gave it to you, I know you feel obligated to wear it. I know that it’s a tradition on stag dos and bachelor parties to try and embarrass the groom.

I guess you thought it was doing just that, and didn’t think much more about it. 

When I walked over to your row of seats and said, “Can I ask about the T-shirt” you said, "...yes?”

So I asked, “is it a joke?”

You responded, “Yes”.

At that point, your friends sat either side of you chimed in,

“Mate, no harm was meant”, and the classic, “Look, anything can be offensive to anyone”. 

Still looking at you, I asked why it was funny, and you replied “Because I’m not trans I guess".

Then you asked me, “Does it offend you?” 

I said, “Well, I’m Trans, so I felt like I had to say something”.

Again, your friends chimed in, “It’s just a joke”, “it wasn’t meant to offend anyone”.

“Oh I realise you probably just thought it was funny to embarrass him,” I said;

“I speak about this stuff for a living, and I know well enough that there wasn’t direct intention to be harmful. But I have to tell you, when I saw that I thought wow, that’s so nice to see...

And then I realised it was a joke at my expense. To embarrass you by making people think you’re Transgender, or that you are in a relationship with a trans person.

I guess I just wanted to share that it wasn’t a nice experience, and I hope you think better of it next time”. 

I wished you the best for your wedding and went back to my seat. 

When I sat down I was shaking. I don’t usually put myself in any situation where I have to out myself in public, especially not to someone who clearly has no understanding or respect for Trans people. 

But I couldn’t ignore it.

I couldn’t sit three rows away from a group of people who thought that the funniest, most embarrassing thing to do to a man on his stag do was to make people think he might be Transgender. 

Unfortunately, experience tells me that those men likely thought I was being at best overly sensitive and at worst intentionally disruptive. Maybe later they laughed about it, maybe it was exactly what they had intended, maybe they forgot about it altogether. 

I guess all I can do is hope that just a tiny part of that moment sticks in their memory. That deep down they understood that there were so many options of ways to be funny without making fun of Trans people. 

I don’t have much hope that either of those things will happen, but it’s all I have. 

That, and writing it down here in the hope that someone else might learn from it. 

As always, thank you for reading.


P.S Some of you may read this and ask how I knew that he wasn't wearing the t-shirt in a supportive way before I decided to approach him. My wife (who was sitting separately to me) had asked him about it previously and he had said he was on his stag-do, indicating it was a joke. I also approached him with the intention that, had he been wearing it as a genuine show of support, I would be able to thank him for doing so.

Trans are in fashion.

Every newspaper, every headline, almost everything you read these days that is not war connected, mentions trans and how they are destroying the world, molesting children, grooming and more - and none of this is true.

This comes from the main stream media backed up by corrupt politicians pushing an agenda against the LGBT community much as Hitler did against the Jews and this gets society in-fighting within and amongst itself as to what is - and what is not - acceptable - and if we took the crooked politicians and media out of the equation, people get along just fine regardless of colour, sex, religion etc. etc. etc. but the media and politicians corrupt the system with lies and bullshit, promote the bad guys way above the good guys and when all we see is those who abuse and rape and molest and THIS is what is pushed at us day after day, OF COURSE THE PEOPLE GET ANGRY and rebel against immigration when they are told so many lies.

Politicians these days are NOT in the business for the people, - they are in business for the fame and the money and hope it might lead onto some chair of a corporation later down the line. Corruption and an uncaring attitude for the masses and just giving lip service is not good enough and at the next General Election I have absolutely no idea who I will be voting for as the two biggies are as thoroughly incompetent and corrupt as I have ever seen and where it seems they WANT immigration to increase as these immigrants will vote for their party, not for what is best for the UK and when we see tens of thousands abusing our system, NHS, Housing,- the benefit scheme, and then mug, rape, groom and even molest - children as well as adults - isn't it time we banned the burqa and banned street displays of worship and ban any thought of a Shia society in the UK - PERIOD.

Many countries are standing strong against the Muslim take over.

The UK, however, seems to be handing the future of our country to the Muslims on a silver platter and asking them to fuck us all up the ass after we have given and given and given and believe me, when we do hand over our country, even THAT will not be good enough for them and we will all face the consequences of not doing enough earlier and will have only the politicians to blame, as they are NOT listening to the people of this country.

'So, tell me, who can we trust ?'


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