Cabin Crew's understandable hates - & your e mails
Flight attendant shares common thing said on plane that could 'land you in a police cell.'
WE get a lot of cabin crew stay here and share many wisdoms of the job with us and many of the things flight attendants hate the most, which includes very common questions passengers ask their crew during a flight. Dan listed the "things you should never say to your cabin crew".
'Where are we now ?'
"Sorry but my built-in GPS isn't working at the moment, that's what the moving map is for on the back of the seat in front of you - at head height, you cannot miss it.'
"I know the Captain's public announcement is pretty dull, but if you'd bothered to listen you would have heard him tell you, in every minute little detail, the exact route we have taken to get here and where we're off to next."
I have a bomb
Dan said: "Surely no one would ever be that stupid to say this on an aeroplane. Wrong! It actually happens more often than you think. "Not funny at all. Not only will it get you into trouble with the crew and fellow passengers, but it could also land you in a police cell."
Checking your bags inside the plane. Dan explained why this is "one of the biggest pet peeves for crew around the world".
"It's quite simple: You bring it you sling it. You pack it you stack it. You tow it, you stow it.
"If you've decided not to check your bag in then you better be damn sure you can actually lift it into the overhead locker yourself. Believe it or not, it's not our job to lift your bag for you.
"If we lifted every bag that we were asked to we'd end up like the Hunchback of Notre Dame and will you pay the bills if we hurt ourselves? Didn't think so."
The flight attendant said: "To be frank, I don't care whether the crew on the last flight let you smoke in the toilet and start a conga line up and down the aisles all flight - It's not happening on my flight.
"You might find our rules and regulations silly and annoying, but by enforcing them we're just doing our job so please let us get on with it."
Can I stand here for a while?
Dan simply said: "No, you can't.
"If you even need to ask that question then the answer will always be no.
"The galley is not a place where you should loiter. Not only is it our work space but it's also our rest area." ?
"Sorry but you've got to have the money honey, if we'd wanted to upgrade you we would have by now.
"Stop asking. It won't happen," he said.
"And no, there is nothing else to eat. This is an Airbus, not Asda."
What do you have?
"Every. Single. Day.
"Would you ask the waiter in a restaurant to list every single item they serve... no! Not only is there a brochure or magazine in your seat pocket, but we've also made an announcement detailing the products we have.
"Asking when we get to you, holds up other people who are still waiting and it's very tiring having to repeat yourself all day. Believe it or not, there are other people on this plane besides yourself."
When asked to choose what cabin crew hate the most, Dan explained: "Each of those wind me up, to be honest. The 'can you put my bag up for me' is a big pet peeve for most cabin crew.
"It's not that we don't want to help you. It's just that if you can't lift it yourself then you really shouldn't have brought it on board.
"However, my most hated one has to be 'you're just a waiter/waitress in the sky' because we are so much more than that.
Thankfully today flying is much safer than it used to be. Therefore our first aid and emergency skills are highlighted less than they used to be. But that's not to say that we still don't use them.
"This was highlighted only recently by the Philippine Airlines crew who helped a mother give birth mid-flight," he explained.
One Cabin crew friend stated that a women refused to talk or even listen to him because she didn't deal with servants, and he retorted that she damned well will listen to him if the plane has to make an emergency landing, and that shut her up.
The rudeness and abuse aimed at cabin crew is shocking, and I even have a friend whop went to jail for 6 months for Cabin Rage after his mental health kicked in while midflight and he went into a full on panic attack and tried opening to planes door. Dumb shit - was handcuffed and arrested on arrival and although mental health, too many drugs and booze added to it and he was sent down for 6 months.
Personally - I have nothing but respect for cabin crew as it is a damned hard job, made worse by having to serve plebeians who think cabin crew are there to serve them like a servant - when the truth is they are not - they are there to protect you if anything goes wrong - THAT is their prime order of business - and they go through horrendous training in smoke filled tunnels with masks on their faces in pitch blackness, and it is NOT all about Chicken or Beef at all.
So the next time you take a flight anywhere, and ESPECIALLY if you are in the cheap seats - do not assume you are anyone or anything special as you are not. You are just another bum on a seat going someplace they have probably just come from and have been to dozens of times before and it is just another day at work for them. So stop being the asshole. Stop being a cunt. be nice. Enjoy your flight and say a big THANK YOU to the cabin crew as you leave and SAY SOMETHING NICE.
They have the power to ground the plane and have you taken off and arrested.
They have the power to get you banned from the airline and all airlines if you misbehave.
They have the power to have the police waiting for you on arrival.
Be respectful and be nice.
Your e mails below
Wanted to thank you John for your piece about Cabin Crew. I have been with BA for decades and the horror stories would fill a book of thoughtless, irresponsible and down right dangerous passengers we have had to deal with. Since Covid it has got far worse. Too many drunks. Too many who assume the mask policy doesn't mean them and on many occasions flights have been delayed as police have been called to escort an anti mask anti vaxer off the plane and where everyone has applauded. I have been accosted and hit - hard - by an irate passenger who was not getting everything she wanted her way - and she was arrested on arrival and prosecuted by the airline and served 90 days in jail. I have helped several births on planes and - REALLY ANNOYING - when we announced ' Is there a doctor on board'' to have a man come up all pompous and full of himself and when we explain there is a women about to give birth and can he help - stated he was a Doctor of FUCKING MUSIC - and I ask you, why would cabin crew announce the needs of a doctor or fucking music ??? and it absolutely beggars belief John that some people can be so absolutely up themselves and so arrogant. So well done on your piece and Happy New Year. Steve.
John: I have been flying now for 10 years. Many horror stories. Many of cabin crew who have gone way beyond the call of duty and still had people complain and one wonders what exactly some people think our job is. I am not here to wipe their ass for them, which I was asked once to do. I am not here to talk through every mile of the journey and I am not here to hold their hand if they are afraid of flying. I am here for health and safety and I will serve meals and drinks etc. but that is NOT my primary job. That, is safety first. Since Covid I have personally been involved in 7 instances of abuse, people being arrested, people causing fights and one one occasion a women spat in my face and she tried to open the emergency door mid flight ( which by the way doesn't open as it is locked and cannot be physically opened from inside like that ) but the other passengers were panicked assuming she was going to open the door and cause them all to be sucked out. She was handcuffed - and it took 4 of us to get her so as she fought us all with real strength, and was taken off the flight in the USA ( she was from the UK ) and was arrested and prosecuted in the USA - and served 6 months in an American jail without any family of friends nearby. Keep going John. Read the weekly Blog and it helps keep me sane in a world going mad, as you say.
Happy New Year! I’ve never yet made it to Hamilton Hall - I’m making that a 2022 New Years resolution!
I wanted to drop you an email to say thank you. I’ve been reading all your newsletters as they come through, and in the middle of all the constant bad news, your messages are so uplifting, I look forward to getting them. I don’t know how many people who’ve never made it to Bournemouth ever contact you to say, so I thought I’d like to email and say thank you.
Hopefully I’ll make it down this year. I’ll need to have a look at what’s on and book (read: commit!) to visiting.
All the best, and Happy New Year!
Having escaped a mentally and verbally abusive relationship, my intention is to book a stay at Hamilton Hall in 2022 to do my little bit in keeping Hamilton Hall going.
I also admit that for selfish reasons i would also like to come and stay. I came many years ago and left feeling very lifted. Having been alone for Christmas it came to me that Hamilton Hall may work its magic again.
I look forward to being there and in the mean time wish you the very best.
Happy New Year John....Wishing you all success and prosperity in the next year! Thanks for the positive notes in your blog, we need more love and less hate going forward, I believe we can do this, we have done so before. here are some fuzzies to keep you warm this year!
Happy New Year John,
Much love to you and your team. I hope that you managed to have a great celebration despite the restrictions. Thank you for your regular updates as they are so worth the wait and always so interesting and naughty lol. It makes my week.
Keep safe and well and hope to catch you soon. David xx
Many thanks, David
Your so right on this !
At the start of the first lockdown I decided to go through my phone list, started with ‘A’ and each week phoned at least two people I hadn’t spoken to in years.
Each call was over an hour and resulted in re connecting with so many old friends, there were no fails and we’ve kept in touch since.
Hope all is well with you, Happy New Year ! Jx
I won’t give you a call ( I know how annoyed you get with pointless calls!) :-)
But just wanna say thanks for sending out your weekly bulletins full of information, stories, jokes and the occasional picture or two;-).
It’s all to easy to forget that someone has actually taken the time to collate, type up, edit and search for fresh content and pictures to send out to us, it’s not done by a machine recording algorithms and tracking what we like! so THANK YOU.
Wishing you a very happy and prosperous new year. I can’t wait to pay a visit to hammy hall when things settle down a bit and the weather picks up.
Once again thank you x
You might not remember me; here Luis.
I had the fortune of enjoying your beautiful paradise this past year. I feel incredibly grateful for having the privilege of meeting you and your special retreat.
It has helped me grow and be a better person, it has given me insight of who I really am and what I really want, and to allow me to enjoy who I am . I will be for ever grateful for SO much you have given so generously to me, and for sharing meaningful and precious time with me.
Thank you again.
I wish you a very happy and fulfilling new year, and send you all my love , respect and admiration!
Hope to see you again soon.